CONGRATULATIONS!

Jayce won a Reflections award for his song, which is called "My Reflection Song" (creative- right?)
Nice job buddy!
I just love that he LOVES to play the piano. It is the best pass-time for him and he literally plays for at least an hour every day!

The lady in the cubicle....

That is how life has been for me- my identity has become this. 

I am the lady in the cubicle on the 2nd floor, down the hall, to the right, directly behind the sign that says

"Compliance Office"

"Shelly Fowlks"

 Yes- the name is even spelled wrong. I don't mind. I don't think anyone will ever notice.

I do love my job. I have become so HIPAA compliant that I can't even talk to myself anymore. But I am grateful to have work. Life has offered  us some changes again which are also really good for us- hard, but good. After having Ross home every night for the last 5 years, he has been moved back to the field as a Battalion Chief. This means 48 hour shifts with 96 hours off in between- but the constant manning staffing has been crazy so he has been working 96 hours on and we have been lucky to have him home for 48 hours in between. 

We call that alot of hours away from home- but Ross calls it Christmas and school and savings- which sounds pretty good, most of the time.....but there are times during the 96 hour shift that I feel like I am going bananas! We wake-up, prepare for the day, leave the house, drop off at school, rush to my cubicle, rush to the school, rush home to get homework and dinner started and then eat and clean up and shower the boy and read scriptures and have family prayer and drop into bed.

I occasionally wish I could quit my job (but I do love it) but I do also long to have a day where I don't feel like a crazy mother-

-running around the house looking for shoes in the morning (and its MY shoes that I can never find- and its because the grand babies like to play in them)-

-When my boy has all the time he wants each morning to eat a balanced breakfast that is warm and homemade and served with juice and milk- okay scratch that. At least a bowl of microwaved oatmeal that he willing eats- that would be a nice change- I feel so awful when I have spent the morning saying 

"Jayce eat your breakfast" 

"take a few more bites" 

"you have 2 minutes to finish that" 

"What the heck have you been doing for the last two minutes?" 

"Didn't I tell you to eat?" 

"What in the WORLD have you been doing all this time Jayce?"

 "Seriously, you need to eat kid?" 

Until I finally shut up and dscide that he can just deal with it himself and if he is hungry at school its his own stinking fault- he will learn. Someday. 

The hassle after school exhausts me- just thinking about it makes my eyes cross. The kid that wont eat in the morning WILL NOT STOP EATING in the PM. I feel like a freaking all night restaurant chef- which is good since we spend plenty of time at the kitchen counter doing homework and reading and chatting and cooking together and laughing, talking about the day and sometimes he will even sing me the song that he is working on- or hum the tune for me-- sometimes Bay has time to tease Jayce- or she has time to just visit before she runs off to work-

Sometimes the grand babies stop by, which means that I get to see their moms and dads too- 

Oh, I love that time of day!

Okay- I feel better now

I am the lady in the cubicle on the 2nd floor, down the hall, to the right, directly behind the sign that says

"Compliance Office"

"Shelly Fowlks"

 Yes- the name is even spelled wrong. I don't mind. I don't think anyone will ever notice.

But at the end of the day I am still a mom and a grandma, and a wife--

Life is good!

 

One of the most interesting things we have seen while out hiking in St. George, Utah

Welcome

Our newest additions
Meet Rylee Paige and Hadlee Jane
Born April 26, 2012
Weighing 5 Lbs 13 Oz and 5 Lbs 6 Oz
And because I am the Grandma to these little sweeties, I think its proper for me to brag on their parents just a little. Both mom (Whitney) and dad (Jordan) are AMAZING, JOYFUL- just DELIGHTED with these two little girls- and big sister Paisley, she is just BEAMING!

I AM SORRY....

Some weeks or days just seem hard to get through.
This week has been one of them.
What can be said to a sweet mother of four who is about to bury her little boy- he was almost three- almost. "I am sorry" just doesn't seem to be enough to describe how I feel- probably how we all feel when a little person leaves this earth.
It helps to know that he is no longer suffering.....
but they will still miss him, and long to cuddle him, and comfort him and care for him. A little boy needs his family-

My heart just hurts for them.

Vision...

About 8 weeks ago I began a series of anti-biotic to get rid of a sinus infection. That is what I was told- although the reason I went to the doctor to begin with was because I was experiencing a great deal of discomfort in my left eye. It watered constantly and my head hurt- a consistent, pounding headache in my left eye- if you could have a headache in your eye- and I can!
So due to my dry scratchy throat and watering eye- he treats a sinus infection. And the anti-biotic seemed to help- after two rounds and some serious eye drops- and about two weeks after the last meds- i have an even worse headache in my eye and my vision has changed drastically in that eye. After spending the day with some adorable cubs scouts out in the bright sun as it glared of the snow- my left eye was useless- I wanted someone to stab me in the eye to relieve the pain. so I went to the doctor again- and this time I learned that my eye hurts because it has many scratches throughout the cornea. Nice. Off to the eye doctor- who explains something I wish I had know 8 weeks earlier- it makes perfect sense now that I know-
Antihistamines were created to dry mucus and such- the eye drops that the first doctor gave me were meant to dry the watering eye- which helped but really dried my eye out- so when I put my contacts in- the dry eye would immediately absorb the moisture- making my lenses uncomfortable- but because I hate wearing glasses- I would suffer- which also meant that I was scratching at my dry contacts all day.
So now- 8 weeks later- I have at least one stage 4 scratch in the cornea and multiple others- not to mention crappy vision(It is sort of like looking through vaseline- nothing is clear) and did I mention that I hate wearing glasses- well- I get to wear them for at least 3 weeks- probably longer- as we work to heal this eye. I might even get to wear a patch! Fun stuff!
or not............

8 is GREAT!

Jayce's baptism was wonderful!
I am a bit embarrassed that it has taken me so long to blog about it- I have excuses- the best one being that the computer and I haven't been working well together- it will not upload his pictures from his baptism- and I hoped that we could work it out. For now, just imagine him in his new church suit with his own brand new set of scriptures and new "missionary" shoes. HANDSOME! Baptism's are amazing!

And a quick catch up- (all about the GRAND BABIES!)
Little Miss Chloie (who will soon be 1) is finally teething. She's pretty unhappy about it- but still just as sweet as ever. She really is the best little girl! And she is also walking! Fun times!

Paisley, who is 2 and a half, LOVED Christmas and every time I see her she reminds me that "Santa brought me presents." I also love her "HO HO HO, BERRRRRY CHRISTMAS" which I have on video- but again, the computer and I cant get along!

Jordan and Whitney's babies are .........................
GIRLS!
This might just be the best mothers curse EVER!
My Jordan has little to NO patience with girl DRAMA.
I always told him he needed to get a grip on it or he would end up with a house full of girls- and who was right??? Actually I think of it more as a mothers blessing! Hopefully he will see it that way too!

I hope you had wonderful times throughout the Holidays!

Happy Birthday!

Jayce turns 8 today.
We love this little boy. He is talented. Loves to talk. Loves to read. Loves to learn. And he loves to write his own music and sing. Here is of his latest for your viewing pleasure- ENJOY

In case you havent heard

Jordan and Whitney are expecting twins in May. We don't know the gender yet- but I am voting for GIRLS! (its a mothers curse- from me to my son who has little to no patients with anything GIRL) But in his defense- he is dang cute with his all girl 2 year old, Paisley.
My camera died, the charger is no where to be found- and I have the cutest video of Paisley telling me that the babies will be named "sweetie" and "the other baby".
That was what I really wanted to share with you- that cute video. Oh well.

And since I am grandma bragging- let me tell you about my sweet Chloie- I am convinced that this little girl is just an angel in disguise. She is just as sweet as she can be, ADORABLE if you want to know the truth, calm, quiet, happy, beautiful.
Kelcey, Chloie and I went to see Breaking Dawn- and honestly she was the best little thing in the movie. Sat on grandmas lap and reached over occasionally to pat mommies face and grin.
So in this situation, the mothers curse has really back fired. Kelcey was my colicy baby, the one that never stopped crying, ever, for 9 months straight. (Thankfully a wise sister in law introduced us to Mylecon Drops at that time and she stopped crying (WHEW) and began talking, and talking and talking.) I always wanted her to have many, many babies just like her.
I still want her to have many, many babies just like her- just with out the colic:)

My Name IS.....

Jayce- at home, that is the only name I have ever been called- unless I am in BIG trouble- and mom calls me Timothy Jayce- thats usually bad news! So imagine how surprised my mom was when she joined my in Primary class a few months ago and heard the teacher refer to me as Timothy- several times-and when she told the teacher that I go by Jayce- the teacher says "Really? He has asked us to call him Timothy."
and then when school started, mom popped into class and Mrs. Page asks mom- "when did you start calling him T.J.?" and mom thinks "now thats a good question- we have always called him Jayce."
And we still do- and probably always will call him Jayce- unless he is in BIG BIG trouble- and then it will be TIMOTHY JAYCE!
I guess you can call him whatever you want to call him- and I can think of a few things that I would like to call him- but I wont-
We chose his name carefully! My father and my brother are both TIMOTHY- dad goes by Tim (or grumpy grandpa, or grandpa Duke as Jayce likes to call him) My brother went by Shane (being named Timothy Shane) and we wanted Jayce to share this name with two great men- but we also love the name Jayce. So its Jayce, buddy- not TJ not T Jayce not timmy or timothy or timmy jayce or timmy J, tim jay- or whatever else you come up with-
This boy is something else!!!!!

AND

Now I have grout!!

TILE

I just have to tell someone
THE BATHROOM HAS TILE no grout yet- BUT TILE
This just might be the best week ever. I have waited forever- for over two years for this. My sweet husband got it in his head OVER two years ago to pull the tile out of the kids bathroom and make some repairs. And that was as far as he went. So for OVER two years I have been gently reminding him that it sure would be nice if we had that bathroom finished. I did what I could (painted and put up a nice shower curtain to hide the bathtub mess- and all the tools and tile things that are sitting in the tub)- and I waited
and waited
and waited:(

He had this whole week off work- I was working- and mentioned that it sure would be nice if he started working on the bathroom- but when Thursday came around and he still had not started, I gave up hope.
Let me just say that we haven't suffered. Ross put in a very, very nice master bathroom with the addition. We all love it- its probably the best room in the house- so we haven't suffered without the use of this tub- BUT it sure would nice to have it done,
IT HAS TILE- HURRAY- and he even finished the window tile in the dining room. (I have been waiting for somewhere near 8 years for that) HAPPY DAY

BEST WEEK EVER

Travel, Homecoming, Soccer and PINK!

We took a quick trip to San Diego the weekend before Ross had meetings in Anaheim. Great plan- we would drive to San Diego Friday- spend Saturday and Sunday seeing the sights and then take Ross to the car rental and leave him to head into Anaheim. The Kids and I were to stay the night in San Diego and drive home Monday morning.
Just a background- I LOVE SAN DIEGO! I beg and BEG and BEG for Ross to apply for jobs there so we can move- and live happily ever after in my dream city!
Since this trip I have changed my mind!! Completely!
We chose the ARMY/NAVY/AIRFORCE/MARINE Family and friends weekend- and there were people crawling all over the place! Shelli and crowds just don't mix! We did eat at our favorite place in Old Town and went to the newly upgraded "Mormon Battalion" museum that is ran by the sister missionaries. WONDERFUL!
The tide pools were awesome- one of our favorite things to do in California is see the tide pools.
We attempted to spend Sunday in Coronado- mostly just so Ross could get a kick out of driving Shelli across that awful bridge. I love the little island- but again it was crawling with crowds- THE ART FESTIVAL- of course! We could not find a place to park- when we finally did find parking it was a $15.00 per hour stall! WOWZA! But we had great crepes and watched the people look at their artsy stuff! We stopped for fuel and - believe it or not -the gas station was out- OUT! NO FUEL! What the heck? So I was envisioning having to walk across that bridge to get fuel- and walk back-
Luckily we made it! WHEW! We decided to drive to Anaheim and stay with Ross there. Good choice for us- he had an amazing room!

Next weekend- Homecoming! Baylie was invited by some dude named Tyson (I think)- He is a soccer player and invited her by supplying a pretty awesome soccer ball, bag and note! Smart boy! She said yes- bought the first dress she saw and some glitzy shoes- allowed me to straighten her hair and put some make-up on her, and she was off! She is the easiest going girl I know!! And BEAUTIFUL!

Then there was the Senior Soccer Game! Lots of PICTURES! So sad! She cried- they all cried! This group of girls have played together since 3rd grade! They are like family! She will miss them and we will miss the parents! We have gained some really great friends through hours upon hours of soccer! LOVE THEM!

AND for our sweet Des- A PINK FAMILY NIGHT!
I wish I had taken pictures of Ross and Jordan tying the shirts- they did a great job- Paisley and I sprayed them. And then we all took pictures for Des! We LOVE YOU DES!!

Inside of Today!

It's Jayce language- If you are doing something to today then you will be doing it "inside of today." If you did something yesterday then you were doing that something "inside of yesterday" If you are going to do something tomorrow- you will do it "inside of the next day"- which is short for tomorrow!
I love it when he asks "What will we be doing inside of today?" It reminds me that I have this day- a full 24 hours- to do something. Its a funny little saying, but really makes me want to do something great "Inside of everyday"

Theme song

There's 81 days of summer vacation and school came along just to end it.
So the annual problem for MY generation is finding a sweet way to say it!--
Like maybe....

Time to get up
hurry get dressed
your clothes are right here by your bed

no cartoons today, just do what I say
you are eating breakfast instead.

Brush your teeth and hair
then run back down stairs
but first get your shoes from your room.

Backpack, lunch and keys-
please keep up with me-
we have to leave home very soon.

Drop them off at school
work and then car pool
soccer and homework and bed

Is it possible
to squeeze PTA
and Presidency meetings in there?

As you can see
there's a whole of stuff to do
now that the kids are back in class

So stick with me cause this busy mom
is gonna do it all (because I have no choice)
that's right
stick with with me cause this busy mom
is gonna so it all!
MMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, can I have another drink of water????????????

A new job.......

And we are calling it a "Permanent-Temporary Position." Mainly because I want/need flexible hours so I can raise my little guy- and be at all the soccer games annoying my teen!
So I wont be returning to my first love- working with children, SAD! But on the other hand, working with adults can be just like working with children!
I have been doing this job since June- but the intention was to cover for a woman that had a baby- she would come back- and I would return to tutoring. Today they offered me a position with company- and I accepted!
I am working with UNIFIED FIRE AUTHORITY in the EMERGENCY OPERATIONS Center. It is a job that I love and I have very humbling moments! The records that I review have taught me this:

Men and Women and often teens really do get so drunk that they fall down the stairs or walk into walls, or drive into trees or parked semis or homes. Sometimes they hit other vehicles, or pedestrians.

Women of all ages, including the very young ones, are raped and assaulted and left feeling worthless and unloved.

Suicide doesn't care how old you are- or what gender you are. It happens way too often in our state. Women generally chose medication, teens choose Listerine or Bleach or other handy substances, and men go for the more violent sources such as hanging or guns or high windows. No matter how they do it- the results are devastating to the families. Most shocking to me is the # of attempted suicides each day and the fact that many of them are elderly people.

Abuse of children and the elderly is a reality! This just leaves me shaking my head!

And sometimes when you are simply enjoying life- biking, jogging, boarding, walking, driving to dance class, taking your family to dinner, going to visit grandma- you get in the way of someone who is drinking, drugging and driving. It is so unfair!

So, like I said- it can be a very somber/sad/emotional work- but I am up for the challenge!

Camping

I has been three years since the Fowlks Family has been out in our trailer. Why three years? I guess the reasons are many- one is soccer. Training, conditioning, tournaments- we have been dedicated to soccer! And work. Ross just hasn't had the time to take off during the summer for a vacation- between work and golf tournaments, mixed in with our soccer= no time!
This year we have gone out twice. The first was an eventful trip to South Willow- west of Tooele. No power, no hook-ups (which meant no potty, no running water) but that wasn't the worst of it. A flat tire on the truck- a spare that is the wrong size and nearly flat as well, and not a gas station in sight, no cell service-- the list goes on. We were happy to cut that trip short, although we took some great hikes and saw a rattlesnake and plenty of cows!
This past weekend we decided to go to Crystal Hot Springs. When we called to make reservations we were led to believe that the campground was empty- not a lot going on there- the slides are not working and one pool is out of service. Perfect! So we head out on Friday after soccer. The park was no where near empty- HOLY PEOPLE EVERYWHERE! Tents on every inch of grass available and trailers in every spot available, WOWSA! We woke each morning to the sound of babies screaming- toddlers squealing and teens laughing. (Family Reunions Everywhere!)
The kids hated the mineral pools- they were crowded and dirty. Baylie watched movies and played games- almost never leaving the trailer- and then there is Jayce! My MR. People person. Sometimes I feel that Heavenly Father sent him to me just to bring me out of my shell a little! I am not a people person- I do not talk to strangers- I actually try to avoid people most of the time- seeing the crowded campground was like a little piece of heaven on earth for my Jayce. He knew all the neighbors, and their neighbors, and their neighbors. He knew every dogs name. What fun he had! I always enjoy watching my family when we are away from home- or out of our ordinary world. Jayce could make friends with a fly- or a piece of dirt- or a gummy bear that he called "little buddy" for four days! I am glad we got to get out in the trailer for a few days before summer ends. I am hating the thought of school starting up again- I just love having the family home!

A little case of BLACKMAIL!

This very morning my son has dressed himself in black basketball shorts- which are not really short on his short legs- they look more like floody pants, and with that a tan shirt that he wore yesterday and probably the day before- everything that has been anywhere near his mouth in the past few days is also on the front of his shirt, and with that his favorite knee length socks, tan plaid shoes AND his long sleeve brown church shirt- AND he did his own hair! YIKES! The kid looks part GANGSTA, part sissy boy and I don't even know where to go with the hair- Its a Mohawk that is pushed forward- so the point is on his forehead. Let me take a second to THANK Baylie for introducing this great hair style and for telling him all the high school kids wear their hair like this. The boy and I have argued all morning about the outfit and hair. He won- it is his body and he is old enough to dress himself- and it is not immodest-in fact in his eyes its freakin awesome- so I was working up a huge poster to hang on his back that said "My mom DID NOT dress me" He liked that which made me mad- so I tried going with "My DAD dressed me" which would be perfect because Jayce has to go into work with me today- that leaves the door wide open for some serious Ross harassing. But Jayce liked that idea too-So, I opted for blogging about him! My blog has been pretty boring since he banned me from telling the world about his funny life. Of course I told him that if he would change his clothes and fix his hair I wouldn't blog about it- that was a no-go, so here it is!
But I have to admit that I don't feel any better about it- I still have to take him to work with me- I am a little bit embarrassed by that. Maybe I will just slap a sticky note on his back that says "I DRESSED MYSELF- AND I DO MY OWN HAIR"

Things that go bump in the night--

or, in this case- they eat small children and kick butt!

1) Baylie has lost her amazing appetite. Right now she is just eating like a normal person, and this seems to really bothering Jayce. He had a nightmare that Baylie ate all of his toys and she still was not full so she began eating him. She started with his feet-- Yuck! But he was visibly shaken by the whole thing- so I hope when Bay gets her appetite back, she craves normal food- not in the form of humans!

2) My sweet, precious sister is having some rough times! I am one of those family members that believes that if I worry and stress enough over everything- it will somehow make everything better.
Generally speaking, I do not handle stress very well. (I can't believe I just admitted that.) In particularly hard times I have been known to get a very stiff, sore neck which is always accompanied by a migraine and some serious vomiting. That's just the way I roll! But as I get older I have tried to worry less, laugh more- and sometimes it works.
Back to my sweet, precious sister. (Someone) is hurting her, badly! So I took matters into my own hands (or into my own dreams:) and I kicked (someones) butt! I hope he is in as much pain as I am in! Its been nearly a week since I had that stupid dream and I still have terrible back pain!

My battle with PANTYHOSE!

And this time- I think I won!
I have owned pantyhose in the past. Sure its been a few years, but I've tried them all- the Sheer To Waist, Control Top, Ultimate Control Top, No Nonsense- in beige, black, off white, white, nude, suntan.
I abandoned them a few years back. I just got tired of the expense of replacing them. In the winter I wear my boots with my knee highs and in the summer I wear (GASP) my own skin! I had not really spent a lot of time stressing over this until recently when the subject came up in a Presidency Meeting.
The R.S. handbook does not state that we must wear pantyhose to church. Some cultures and countries don't even know what pantyhose are. The women that I am serving with in the Stake Relief Society seemed to feel that it is a complete disgrace that women do not wear them to church. I was speechless! I don't wear them. Am a wicked person because I don't love pantyhose? It really got me thinking about how I dress. The next day I stopped and bought a pair of pantyhose on my way home from work. I didn't love that these women that I adore would think less of me because I don't wear the silly things! I was determined to wear them to our Leadership Meeting- just so they could see that I am a good lady.
I put them on- I took them off- I cried- I put them on again- I really dislike them- I took them off- I did not wear them to the meeting! Couldn't do it!
Maybe they noticed- maybe they didn't.
But what I learned that night is that I care way too much about what other people think! Period! I do!
But should I care so much about what others think of me that I will change who I am?

In the end I guess I am just not ready to change me!
I am not a pantyhose wearer!
Pantyhose will not make me love and care for my family, friends and ward members any more than I already do!
Pantyhose will not change my testimony of my Savior, or my love for the scriptures. Pantyhose will not make my prayers more sincere.
I am okay without them!